I fluffed my hair, dabbed my lipstick and gave myself one last check in the mirror … then took a deep breath.
I opened the door.
And there he stood …
Tall, Dark and Dirty.
Seriously. He was filthy. His clothes weren’t washed. There was dirt underneath his fingernails and he smelled bad.
I couldn’t believe this man had showed up unwashed for our first date. Shocking.
He picked me up directly from work.
Before he could open his mouth …
Before he could say one thing …
Before our date began …
It was over.
In the first three seconds of our meeting, we were done.
This man was definitely NOT MY MAN!
Although my date made a memorable entrance, it was not a favorable one.
No matter what anybody thinks … Presentation is important.
This man didn’t even realize how poorly he presented. He’s not alone. Even as women, we don’t realize how we are perceived when we meet a man for the first time.
Here are three ways from Alex Wise ( Loveawake CEO) to make a favorable first impression on your man.
1. Dress Your Part
When going out to meet your man, it’s important to look your best. I know this sounds like a no-brainer, but often we aren’t aware of what “our best” means.
Are you wearing the best clothes for you? Does the color enhance your face and bring out your eyes? Does what you’re wearing fit you? Do your clothes flatter your body or hide it? Is it your style?
Dressing like a teenager because it’s the latest style is not dressing your part. You want your clothes to support you. You want to wardrobe to highlight your best features … your lips, your eyes or your slender waist.
Your man wants you to look good. He’s attracted to you visually, so give him something nice to see.
Wear something soft. Wear something touchable. And don’t forget to wear your smile!
2. Act Your Part
Are you courteous? Do you listen? Do you let him show you who he is?
Or do you impress him with your accomplishments and entertain him with your stories first?
Who’s leading the date? Your man or you? No matter how strong we are as women, we like it when a man takes the lead. We want our man to invite us out and make a plan.
When we ask for his number or call him or text … we’re playing the part of the Hero.
When we impress him with our success at work, we turn our date into a business deal.
So with your man, you must act your part.
That means if he’s acting the part of the masculine Hero, you’re acting the part of the feminine “Ingenue.” That means being available and receptive to his lead. It means being open to his ideas and hearing what he has to say.
See if you enjoy being with him and if he’s interesting.
Every romantic relationship has two leading roles. Acting your part is crucial for being in a healthy, long-term relationship. And that (as far as I know) will never change.
3. Speak Your Part
Do you talk too much? Are you critical? Do you judge? Do you say “Yes” to his ideas? “Thank you” to his compliments? And “Please” to what he offers?
When it’s uncomfortable can you say “No” and mean it?
How we speak to our partners is how we build intimacy with them. We don’t want to go competitive by talking too much or being critical of his suggestions or judging what he’s wearing. We want to communicate and understand him. A man’s brain and a woman’s brain are so different that it’s amazing that we get together in the first place.
As women, it’s in our best interest to understand a man’s language and how he takes in information so that when we speak, he can hear us and understand us.
In a romantic relationship we must know how to speak to our men. Period. They simply don’t have the vocabulary or the capacity to speak like us.
So next time as you prepare to make a favorable impression to meet your man remember … how you dress, how you act and how you speak … can determine the success (or lack of success) in your romantic relationship.